Random Thought 7
Over It.
Many 'a times I knocked on Death's door-literally begg'n to come in; I even broken an entry a couple of times, but each time It sent me pack'n back to sucky reality. It's probably tired of seeing me by now, and so I told It that I wouldn't bother It anymore until It came for me. It sounds kind of sad and sick, someone chas'n Death down for an early arrival-but it just feels like I been here too long.
I don't know how to describe it, but I'm simply over it. I guess boredom gett'n the best of existence. Some people ask me, "well what do u want?" I reply with, what I want isn't here in this reality. They ask me, "how do u know what u want isn't here." I say, because I haven't experienced it yet and probably never will here. I am one to think that the grass is greener on the other side because it's dead on this side.
So I wait, as I am suppose to, as I always did. I was born, raised, recieved an education so that I can contribute to a schizophrenic society by working for stress and intangibles, mabe get married and have children, then die. It really is as black and white as that, how stimulating. My question in that process is, where does the happiness part come in, and how long does it last? Everyone I talk to, rich, poor, or middle say their content-not happy.
I wonder how long did it take, for the people I asked, for them to realize they were substituting happiness for content? I hope not years. That would piss me off if I thought life was going to provide me with something that never came, so I had to settle for whatever was there-mediocre instead of bliss. There really isn't anything u can do, u can try and bargain with God on why u got the short end of the stick-but everyone got the same size stick it's just packaged differently.
So this is what I see in Life, and it, Life, is the hardest thing I ever had to do. I never really thought I'd see it for what it really was, nothing more or less, at such a young age. People tell me to be happy that I was able to see and understand what takes people a life time; I'm not sure if it's something to be happy about. Sometimes sleeping through life has it's benefits, being awake only makes u resent the ones who are sleep and envy the ones who are dead and moved on to the greener grass.
Many 'a times I knocked on Death's door-literally begg'n to come in; I even broken an entry a couple of times, but each time It sent me pack'n back to sucky reality. It's probably tired of seeing me by now, and so I told It that I wouldn't bother It anymore until It came for me. It sounds kind of sad and sick, someone chas'n Death down for an early arrival-but it just feels like I been here too long.
I don't know how to describe it, but I'm simply over it. I guess boredom gett'n the best of existence. Some people ask me, "well what do u want?" I reply with, what I want isn't here in this reality. They ask me, "how do u know what u want isn't here." I say, because I haven't experienced it yet and probably never will here. I am one to think that the grass is greener on the other side because it's dead on this side.
So I wait, as I am suppose to, as I always did. I was born, raised, recieved an education so that I can contribute to a schizophrenic society by working for stress and intangibles, mabe get married and have children, then die. It really is as black and white as that, how stimulating. My question in that process is, where does the happiness part come in, and how long does it last? Everyone I talk to, rich, poor, or middle say their content-not happy.
I wonder how long did it take, for the people I asked, for them to realize they were substituting happiness for content? I hope not years. That would piss me off if I thought life was going to provide me with something that never came, so I had to settle for whatever was there-mediocre instead of bliss. There really isn't anything u can do, u can try and bargain with God on why u got the short end of the stick-but everyone got the same size stick it's just packaged differently.
So this is what I see in Life, and it, Life, is the hardest thing I ever had to do. I never really thought I'd see it for what it really was, nothing more or less, at such a young age. People tell me to be happy that I was able to see and understand what takes people a life time; I'm not sure if it's something to be happy about. Sometimes sleeping through life has it's benefits, being awake only makes u resent the ones who are sleep and envy the ones who are dead and moved on to the greener grass.
posted by Andreá at 12:08 AM
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